R.Kelly Responds Says It’s Too Hot To Piss On Girls & Hold Them Hostage

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“You ever seen a millionaire pissing in this July heat”

Exactly said singer R. Kelly after the website Buzzfeed came forward with an article saying he is holding young women hostage.  A 19 year old who he had met at one is his concerts around this time last year is still holding on strong, she has been seen with him on several occasions.  He apparently has been paying the young woman over Twenty Thousand Dollars a month to be his personal pet.

“They can leave.. But would you leave all this money”Related image

Age ain’t nothing but a number but pissing on a bitch never gets old.  We are sure that no one has forgotten that Kelly was accused of peeing on a teenage girl on video several years ago so it’s kind of hard not to think this young woman is getting pissed on for a large amount of money.

Dumpster Licking Instagram Model Found Dead One Week After Posting This Video

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“After seeing this video there’s no telling what she has done for money”

Said Dr. Kiawi from the Miami division of the Center Of Disease Control, the young Instagram Model was hospitalized after friends found her turning green and non-responsive, the hospital contacted the CDC as soon as she was checked. Wilcox sanitation said they had recent brought the dumpster she licked in from Dade County detention center where several inmates had Bacterial Meningitis. We clean dumpsters to industry standards but some bacteria are harder to kill than others.

Let this be a lesson to all people young and old, please don’t do stupid things for money or you could end up like her. Likes and 300.00 are not worth losing your life.

 

Al Sharpton Soul Leaves Body After Attempting On Handed Push-Up On Desk

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That N*gga needs to be helping black people instead of trying to get his likes up on christian mingle.  “

Al Sharpton has been on top of social medias wild out list when he was seen attempting to do several push-ups on his office desk.  As seen in the video below you see his soul slowly leaving his body while attempting to do a one handed push-up.

“He gonna die.. But it’s my job to record this clown”


Said Sharpton’s assistant, it was actually kind of funny but the office is not the place for that type of humor.  Over 23,000 email complaints have came in saying That N*gga needs to be helping black people instead of trying to get his likes up on christian mingle.

Cleveland Man Shot Dead On Basketball Court After Refusing To Play A Game Of 21

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“Challenge Me”

 Cleveland Ohio– a 27 year old Cleveland man was gunned down on a city basketball court in front of his 13 year old nephews.  The 27 year old man over heard two men having a dispute and tried to stop it, it was then that one of the man challenged him and got angry when he refused.

“I forgot something…I’ll be right back”

Were the last words the young boys heard from their uncle before he was shot 2 times in the head then stood over him and shot him once more.  The two men are still on the run and the 27 year old man was pronounced dead at the scene, when will these acts of violence stop in the community?

Rapper DMX Sues Cigarette Company For 5 Million And Wins, Claims Cigarette’s Ruined His Career

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“I rather him be smoking crack than be sitting there chain smoking  cigarette’s “

Said A New York Judge after ruled in the favor of rapper DMX after he claimed that high cigarette prices and the smoke ruined his career.  DMX was one of top Rap artist of his time until he turned to tobacco products to ease his pain.  Friends say they noticed a change in X when shit started to vanish into thin air,  gold watches, rings and even cars.

“Cigarette’s burn my chest … Crack doesn’t do that to people”Image result for DMX smiling

Crack Cocaine was not in the picture, witness Jason Posey said he saw the rapper smoking something out of a pipe and it sure didn’t look like a Cig.  Later on that day a Walgreen’s employee reported his 92 station wagon stolen; it was recovered with the rapper sleep in the back, where he then told cops that they are making cigarette’s way too strong.

 

 

“LiL Man Hunt” Ended After Cops Arrest Midget For Sneaking In Elementary Schools Eating Lunch

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“He was small but had a grown head”

Said 18 Year old Wes Chambers as he noticed kids screaming in the ball pit at the local Chuck-E_Cheese saying someone’s in here tickling us.  Wes told cops that he didn’t think much about it until he saw 26 year old Jamal Winston standing on a chair in the men’s restroom taking a piss in the sink.

“I tried to grab him but he was fast & strong”

Winston then ran out the rest room to the front of the building where he began grabbing tickets and throwing kids to the ground.  Cops say they have been trying to find him for about two weeks after a he was spotted eating lunch in a local Elementary school.

Dave Chappelle Says Trump Want’s Out, Thinks He Will Quit On His Lunch Break

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“This isn’t a job at Walmart MF, It’s America”

Trump will not finish his term and thinks that he will just quit on a lunch break and never come back to the White House.  The MF will leave everything behind in there because that’s just what rich people do, you know travel with no bag just ball out and buy new shit when you get to your next stop.

“He just doesn’t want to be remembered as a loser”

Image result for trump's advisors

Just imagine this Trump screaming at his television set from within side the walls of the White House. He doesn’t like how the media has been portraying him or how the investigation is going.  It’s said he has never been on anyone time and is not going to change up just because America wants him to.

Hospital Janitor Says Beyonce Faked Pregnancy After Seeing Twins Crawling Around

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“Either they are 4 months old or she paid for Shaq’s sperm”

Said hospital janitor Willie Batters, Willie told media that he is no where close to being the smartest man in the world but he knows a grown ass baby when he see one crawl out into the hallway.  They both looked him in the eyes and smiled showing tiny teeth!

“I saw them walking.. They got teeth

Bates wasn’t going to come forward with this information but after he was denied an autograph from the two he changed his mind.  he went on to say i know a baby when i see one, and them niggas grown.

Judge Tells Kodak Black You Look Like My Dog After Showing Up With No Gold Teeth

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“He looks like a pit bull puppy”

A Miami Judge ordered rapper Kodak Black to remove is gold teeth in order to be released from jail.  As crazy as it may sound it’s actually true, A recent post from the rapper shows him Gold Tooth Less.  Many of his fans made comments saying he was a sell out but being a sell out is better than being someone’s bitch in jail.

26 year old club security Demack Williams said after seeing Black with out his Golds that he looked like a 2 year old puppy.  Kodak Plans on become more commercial now that he’s no longer wearing Golds.

Steven A. Smith Says At The End Of The Day Lebron’s Going Fishing & You’re Going To Work

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“I’d rather be fishing than going to work”

As we all know Lebron James was once again defeated by KD and Warriors in five games, which left many King James fans in their feelings.  Steven A. took it in his own hands to tell the world, you might not like it but Lebron’s gone fishing and you’re going back to work, Savage!  At the end of the day it’s just a game and many people have forgot that. Image result for lebron james fishing

“90 Percent of fan’s never played High School basketball”

The Warriors win put Lebron at 3-5 in the finals, The Michael Jordan and Lebron talk stops here.  He will never be MJ he will just be King James, one of the best to play his position.

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